|
Cache (R)
A French TV personality, his wife and son become the victims of a
man who is seeking revenge for vague transgressions many years ago.
Like going to see a play, watching a foreign film can be
intimidating for many people. Because it's the "legitimate theater"
or a popular movie from another country, there is a tendency to
believe that if you didn't like it, it is because you didn't
understand it and you are therefore hesitant to react negatively for
fear of people thinking that you are stupid, shallow or artistically
challenged. When this highly acclaimed film was over, a stranger
asked me to explain the ending to him. This created a dialogue
throughout the Spectrum Theater (a rarity) and the consensus was
that THIS FILM STINKS. People seemed genuinely relieved to discover
that others hated it and that they were not idiots to think that. I
can forgive a film for being a bit tedious and pretentious if the
ending packs a punch but the "climax" was pathetic and I just wanted
all of the boring characters to die in French with subtitles. 111
minutes.
Capote
(R)
Based on actual events. After noticing a small story in The New
York Times about a quadruple murder in Kansas, author Truman
Capote (Philip Seymour Hoffman) decides to write a non-fiction
follow up to his classic Breakfast At Tiffany's, based on the
gruesome crime. The project will be his last as it eventually
consumes him. Slow paced and grim but fascinating. Also starring
Catherine Keener and Chris Cooper. 114 minutes.
 
Captain Corelli's Mandolin (R)
I was fixin' to take the tractor down into the city anyway when I heard tell of a new
movin' picture called "somethin' er other Mandolin", a bluegrass show, or so I
thunk.
When it comes to anything bluegrass, I'm all over it like Oprah on a baked ham. I reckoned
that fancy new movie house was just down the street from where my cousins got hitched last
summer. Well that new picture-show shed is slicker than deer guts on a door knob but them
prices will kill ya. At least they give me a free courtesy cup to spit my dip
inta.
Weren't no fiddles, banjers, geetars 'er nothin' in this movie. I kept a
waitin' fer
"Uncle Pen", "Sally Goodin" or even "Dueling Mandos" but all I got was some
hoopin' and carryin' on like Pal-Yat-Chee! It all takes place on this here Greek Island
called Acidophilus where no one seemed to use any dairy products. Lactose, the town's doc,
has a beautiful daughter (Penelope Cruz) who falls in love with a handsome Eyetalian
Officer (Nicholas Cage) who's life is spared causin' he hugged another man. They did offer
ta give me my money back but what the heck. It weren't that bad.
The Cat's Meow (PG13)
Set in 1924, publishing magnate William Randolph Hearst hosts a small party aboard
his yacht in California. Hearst's guest list reads like a who's-who of that era's rich
and famous. The film is based on an actual death and subsequent cover-up during the
weekend cruise. Ubiquitous Kirsten Dunst (Spider-Man) is perfectly cast as the object
of a romantic tug-of-war between Hearst and Charlie Chaplin (Eddie
Izzard). Directed by
Peter Bogdanovich, The Cat's Meow is a clever period piece. Also starring Jennifer
Tilly,
Edward Hermann and Cary Elwes. 110 minutes.
Catch Me If You Can (PG13)
A smart, good-looking teenager (Leonardo DiCaprio) is able to pass himself off as
an airline pilot, doctor and attorney. He eventually becomes a master at forging
checks and leaves a paper trail across The United States and Europe, eventually
attracting the attention of FBI Agent Hanratty (Tom Hanks). Directed by Steven
Spielberg,
Catch Me If You Can succeeds beautifully as a lighthearted crime drama but
falls flat as a family melodrama. Too bad because this is a great caper flick.
Also starring Christopher Walken. 140 minutes.
Changing Lanes (R)
Gavin Banek (Ben Affleck) and Doyle Gipson (Samuel L. Jackson) are having a bad day.
A really bad day. While driving on the FDR, their cars collide. Both men are running late
for important legal proceedings. Benek refuses to give Gipson, whose car is disabled,
a ride to court. Benek leaves an important document at the scene, which Gipson recovers
and uses as leverage for revenge. As this Good Friday unfolds, the situation escalates.
All this while both characters are simultaneously battling inner demons. This is American
mainstream film making at it's best. A taut screenplay, an A-list cast, great New York
locations and first-rate direction by Roger Michell. Big budget bucks were spent wisely.
Go see this movie! Also starring Dylan Baker, Toni Collette, William Hurt and Sydney
Pollack. 100 minutes.
Charlie And The Chocolate
Factory (PG)
Willy Wonka (Johnny Depp), an eccentric chocolatier, randomly
inserts five "golden tickets" into a run of candy bars. The lucky
winners receive an all day tour of the Oz-like factory. Has Wonka
suddenly become benevolent or is this a desperate cry for help?
Admittedly, I'm not a huge Tim Burton (director) or Johnny Depp fan.
Having said that, this hyper-quirky remake is a joy to watch from
start to finish. Finally, Burton's style has found the perfect
story. Great music by the aptly named Danny Elfman too. Charlie
And The Chocolate Factory is destined to become a classic. 115
minutes.
Cheaper By The Dozen 2
(PG)
Sequel to the 2003 release which was a remake of the 1950 original
featuring Clifton Webb and Jeanne Crain. The 2003 version was a
fresh, funny and heartfelt look at the Baker family in loving
turmoil. Cheaper 2 is like leftovers from a great meal that
were stored in the refrigerator for a few days, tossed into a
microwave and then served. We're not supposed to notice that even
though all the basic elements are there it's nowhere near as good as
it was originally. The kids will like it but it's really not very
good. Starring Steve Martin, Bonnie Hunt, Eugene Levy, Hilary Duff
and Piper Perabo. 94 minutes.
Chicago (PG13)
This musical, staged circa 1975, was directed for film by Rob Marshall. Much like the recent
Moulin Rouge, Chicago will please even the most cynical movie enthusiast. The story
centers around two actresses (Renee Zellweger and Catherine Zeta-Jones) who are thrown into
the Cook County Jail for separate murders.
Chicago succeeds on every level. The many musical numbers are catchy and well done,
as is the acting and choreography. Even a singing and dancing Richard Gere didn't make me want
to throw up. Go see this. Also starring the great John C. Reilly
(Boogie Nights, Gangs Of New York) and Queen Latifah (What country?). 113 minutes.
Cinderella Man
(PG13)
A washed up Depression Era boxer is given one last bout and parlays
it into an unbelievable comeback. What's good about this film is
also its weakness. Because it is a big budget mainstream Hollywood
film it stars a talented but ubiquitous cast, has an authentic
period look and feel but no subtlety or nuance. We know what to
think and feel because the dialogue is straightforward and the score
directs our emotions. Director Ron Howard certainly knows how to
give the masses what they want but fails to challenge them in any
way. This movie couldah beenah contendah. Starring Russell Crowe,
Renee Zellweger and Paul Giamatti. 144 minutes.
City By The Sea (R)
Vincent LaMarca (Robert DeNiro), a troubled veteran NYC police officer, is
plagued by personal problems. Vincent's father was convicted and executed for a
killing in the 50's. He is an admitted wife beater and deadbeat dad. His son may have
murdered his partner.
City By The Sea is part crime drama, part melodrama. Great performances by
DeNiro,
newcomer James Franco and Frances McDormand
(Fargo, Almost Famous) make an overwrought screenplay a bit more palatable.
Also starring Patti LuPone
(Evita), George Dzundza (Law And Order) and Anson Mount
(Isn't that what director Garry Marshall used to yell at the actor that played Potsie
just before he started shooting a love scene?) 108 minutes.
City Of God (R)
A remarkable look at gang life in the slums of Rio de Janeiro. Employing a non-linear
storytelling technique similar to
Pulp Fiction and Snatch, a seemingly never-ending cycle violence and
human tragedy unfolds. In Portuguese with subtitles. 135 minutes.
Clerks 2 (R)
Beneath the gross out gags, foul language and inter species erotica
lies a very funny film with a sweet romance and a nifty dance number
thrown in for good measure. Written and directed by Kevin Smith who
also appears as Silent Bob. Also starring Brian O'Halloran, Jeff
Anderson, Jason Mewes, Trevor Fehrman and the irresistible Rosario
Dawson (Rent, Sin City, MIB II) who lights up the screen
every time she appears. 92 minutes.
Click (PG13)
The basic idea of this movie is a direct lift from a classic 1960's
"Twilight Zone" episode about a magic stopwatch. Michael Newman
(Adam Sandler), a workaholic architect, receives a universal remote
control from an apparent mad scientist named Morty (Christopher
Walken). The remote has the power to fast forward Michael through
entire chunks of his life, enable him to relive (but not change) the
past, make time stand still, etc. Like most of Sandler's big screen
work, this film is a celluloid contradiction but even more so.
Throughout Click, Sandler's Newman does things like kick his
son's swim team coach in the groin, fart in his bosses face and
encourage his dog to habitually hump a stuffed animal. So you'd
think that this is another Big Daddy, 50 First Dates
or Happy Gilmore right? While all the adolescent hijinks is
taking place there are a great many truly tender moments that are
reminiscent of films such as It's A Wonderful Life, Peggy
Sue Got Married and Groundhog Day. Had he dialed back the
juvenile humor, this could have been a classic despite the stock
ending. Sandler must have loved casting Fonzie and Marge Simpson as
his parents and stunner Kate Beckensale as his wife. But in real
life, beauties like Beckensale don't go for schlubs like Sandler.
That would be like someone such as, say, Rachael Ray falling for a
guy like me. Only in the movies. I saw Click twice and I
laughed and cried both times. Also starring Henry Winkler and Julie
Kavner. 98 minutes.
The Closet
(R)
Used to be, proof positive that the French were crazy was the fact that they regarded Jerry Lewis as a comic genius. Turns out
that the French were right about "Le Grand Idiot" (check out Lewis' earliest work both on the silver screen and in nightclubs)
and we are the idiots. Daniel Auteil (The Widow Of St. Pierre) stars as
Pignon, a dull, divorced accountant who must pretend that he's gay in order to save his job at a condom factory. This is simply
one of the funniest, most insightful and poignant films that I have seen in a long time. A must see. Also starring Gerard Depardieu
(Green Card). In French. Don't be scared away by the subtitles.
Coach Carter (PG13)
An inner city high school hires a new basketball coach (Samuel L.
Jackson) who promises to bring discipline and a winning attitude to
the court, the classroom and the mean streets. If the 70's television
show "The White Shadow" was released as a film in 2005, this would be
it. 140 minutes.
Collateral Damage (R)
Hollywood is famous for it's knee-jerk reactions to current events.
Collateral Damage was supposed to premier in the fall of 2001 and then
the tragic events of September 11th occurred. With millions invested and fans in a state of ready, it wasn't a
matter of if, it was a matter of when. Arnold Schwarzenegger plays Brewer, a
Los Angeles firefighter who's wife and son are killed when a bomb, meant to kill
diplomats and military personnel, explodes near a cafe where they are waiting for
him. It's then pay-back time Schwarzenegger style. If you like state of the art
American action pictures, this is your film. It's been said that Collateral Damage
is the kind of movie Hollywood won't make any more. Hollywierd will
certainly make less of them in troubled times but I'd bet that this isn't the
last of these that we will see. Also starring (in a rare mainstream appearance) John
Turturro,
Elias Koteas and the always disturbing John Leguizamo. 115 minutes.
Confessions Of A Dangerous Mind (R)
In 1979 while visiting my brother and his wife in Los Angeles, I auditioned for Chuck
Barris' "The Gong Show". That memory came rushing back to me during a scene in
Confessions where Barris (Sam Rockwell) watches a mediocre singer audition and gets
the idea that she should be killed. He instead settles on guest celebrities eliminating
contestants by hitting a large gong. "The Gong Show" was a brilliantly funny program but
Barris was held personally responsible for the decline of western civilization because of
his television programs. This man, who also created shows such as "The Newlywed Game" and
"The Dating Game" and wrote the hit song "Pallisades Park" further claims to have been a
hit man for The CIA with 33 kills to his credit. Whether Barris was an
assassin or not isn't the point of this film. It's simply a brilliantly strange comedy,
focusing on a very complex man, set in America's baby boom years.
Confessions Of A Dangerous Mind, like the best of Barris' work, is quite entertaining
but should not be taken too seriously. A very nice job by first time director George
Clooney.
Also starring Drew Barrymore, Rutger Hauer, George Clooney (Ocean's Eleven), Julia Roberts
(Ocean's Eleven), with cameos by Brad Pitt (Ocean's Eleven) and Matt Damon
(Ocean's Eleven).
113 minutes.
The Constant Gardener
(R)
A British diplomat's wife is murdered in Africa while gathering
incriminating facts against a drug company. Her husband will not
rest until he uncovers the plot. Suspenseful, beautifully filmed and
flawlessly acted. Starring Ralph Fiennes and Rachel Weisz. 129
minutes.
Constantine (R)
Amongst we mortals live half-devils and half-angels who try to steer
us towards good or bad. One brave man (Keanu Reeves), who has been
condemned to Hell for some sort of sin, spends his last days on Earth
(he is dying from lung cancer) chain-smoking cigarettes, performing
exorcisms and killing half-devils in an attempt to redeem his soul. Or
something like that. There's plenty of blood, goo, holy water and
religious mumbo-jumbo here but most of us have already seen this stuff
in superior films such as The Exorcist and John Carpenter's
remake of The Thing. Also starring Rachel Weisz. 120 minutes.
The Count Of Monte Cristo (PG13)
Jim (The Weasel) Caviezel portrays Edmond Dantes, an 18th century sailor who is betrayed by his
best friend Fernand Mondego (Guy Pearce) in the new action/adventure picture
The Count Of Monte Cristo. This film is reminiscent of an old Errol Flynn swashbuckler.
The middle third of this movie takes place in Chateau d'If, a French island prison and features
veteran Richard Harris as fellow inmate Faria. Faria teaches Edmond how to read, write and defend
himself. He also provides Edmond with a map that leads to a fabled treasure submerged off the island
of Monte Cristo. Once Edmond escapes, he can use the riches to buy a new identity and sweet revenge.
This is not a great film and Mr. Pearce's perpetual effeminate sneer becomes an annoyance but it
will make a very good TV movie in a few years. Also starring Luis Guzman and Dagmara
Dominczyk.
Crash (R)
Quick; what's the difference between coincidence and irony? Paul
Haggis' (Million Dollar Baby) thought provoking new film is
full of both. Its exploration of racism in contemporary Los Angeles is
a bit contrived but forgivable given the story's impact and its fine
ensemble cast. Even much maligned actors such as Sandra Bullock and
(gasp) Tony Danza shine. co-in-ci-dence: A seemingly planned
sequence of accidentally occurring events. i-ro-ny: Incongruity
between what might be expected and what actually happens. Also
starring Matt Dillon, Don Cheadle (Boogie Nights), Brendan
Fraser, Ridiculous, Ryan Phillippe and Thandie Newton. 100 minutes.
The Crime Of Father Amaro (R)
A young handsome priest is sent to a small town where he immediately falls in love with a beautiful young woman. There are also sub-plots involving drug money, the catholic church and guerrillas fighting a drug lord. I found the film disappointing and found myself waiting for the beautiful young woman to remove her clothing. Starring Gael Garcia Bernal (pick TWO names hunky Latin dude). In Spanish with subtitles. 120 minutes.
The Crocodile Hunter - Collision Course (PG)
If you are anything like me, your first thought was: Great, a Paul Hogan rip-off. Whereas Hogan's
Crocodile Dundee was a hunter/killer, Aussie Steve Irwin is a capturor/relocator. Irwin and his wife
Terri wrangle crocks, orphaned baby kangaroos, poisonous snakes, giant spiders and the like. There
are sub-plots involving the CIA, a satellite beacon and a colorful cattle rancher but this is mostly
an hour and a half of entertaining Discovery Channel programming. Irwin is full of down-under wit and
energy and damned if he isn't really rolling around with huge crocodiles. The theater was full of moms
and their surprisingly well behaved children. Crikey! 89 minutes.
Crossroads (PG13)
As time goes by, the line between adult and child entertainment becomes more and more blurred.
Kids want and get mature themes and situations while many adults opt for more juvenile content.
The brilliant social satire of a television show like The Simpsons is a perfect example.
Crossroads, Britney Spears' big screen debut, is a real dilemma for any parent of a
young teen. Three pretty high school graduates who are childhood pals decide to run away from
their Georgia hometown. Ben, a mysterious musician who they barely know agrees to drive them to
Los Angeles. Let's see, Lucy (Spears) talks about touching a boy's reproductive organ and later
loses her virginity to the 30 year old Ben who it turns out has served time in prison. Her
unmarried and pregnant friend Mimi (Taryn Manning) confesses that she was actually raped by
Kit's (Zoe Saldana)fiancé. Mimi loses the baby after a tumble down a flight of stairs. Want me
to go on? I actually liked this film a little. Bottom line: I don't think that I would want
my 13 year old daughter to see this movie and isn't that Spears' core audience? Also starring
as Ben, the aptly named Anson Mount, Dan Aykroyd (who has made a second career out of playing
dorky dads) and smutty Kim Catrall. 90 minutes.
Crush (R)
Best friends Kate, Janine and Molly are single, forty-something professionals living in
England. Kate (Andie MacDowell) falls in love with a 25 year old organist and her friends
strongly disapprove. They pull an absolutely unforgivable trick on the happy couple that
Kate eventually forgives them for. This is an uneven but watchable chick-flick. Romantic
comedies aren't necessarily supposed to be believable anyway. 110 minutes.
The Curse Of The Jade Scorpion (PG13)
Woody Allen is a lot like a Slim Jim. People either love him or hate him. And then there are those that still love him but
consider his post Annie Hall/ Manhattan/ Hannah And Her Sisters work to be spurious at best. Much like the recent
Small Time Crooks, Jade Scorpion isn't a home run but it's a stand-up double. This funny film
involves Allen as a detective who is trying to solve a string of jewel heists. It's far from The Wood-Meister's best movie but
it is way better than most of what's on the screen these days. Also starring Helen Hunt, Dan
Aykroyd, Wallace Shawn, Elizabeth Berkley, Charlize Theron and David Ogden Stiers (Pick TWO names there, Charles).
Cursed (PG13)
No pre-screen, a cameo by the talentless Scott Baio and a lame
performance of the dreadful "Little Red Riding Hood" by Bowling For
Soup were bad omens. This comedy/horror film about werewolves in the
Hollywood Hills is a disaster on every level. Skip this dog. Starring
Christina Ricci, Judy Greer (Get some sleep!) and Jesse Eisenberg. 96
minutes.
|
